Alyra’s Birth
Monday June 29, 2009 7:22 pm in her mother’s bed
I teetered in labor activities- contractions that were often just tight, and some that were uncomfortable, but not terribly painful, for nearly a week before she was born. I guess I got a lot of work done with those random contractions! At 12:30 on Sunday afternoon, I lost my mucus plug and had a bit more bloody show through out the afternoon and next morning. Still having totally random contractions, between 10 and 30 minutes apart, I figured I had a long while. At about 12:30 on the 29th I started to feel like things were really getting started, but still a little slow. I was having regular contractions, that were less than 10 minutes apart, but still varying wildly within that frame. (2 minutes, then 8 minutes, etc.) They were more intense, but only 30 to 45 seconds long.
I called Terri and Jenny, who also both figured I had a while. I wasn’t feeling terribly anxious and told them to go about their day. As the afternoon progressed, they got a little closer, but never really got a regular rhythm. At around 2:30 (I think) I told Craig he should go a head and come home from work. I was still feeling that I had plenty of time, but really just wanted his company. I knew it was going to be sometime within a day, so I didn’t figure I was wasting too much vacation time—(We were trying to wait as long as possible to make sure he got as much time off after her birth as possible). He came home and my mom came over and did the dishes and picked up the kids.
Craig and I just kind of hung out after that. We were playing and laughing and even making out a little (kissing). Whenever I had a contraction, I’d get on my hands and knees and have him push on my lower back. It definitely made contractions more tolerable to be in this position and have his help. I hadn’t really needed much help coping earlier in the day. They just came, I breathed, and they went.
I sent Craig to the store for ice cream and took a shower to take the edge off while he wasn’t around to help. I started singing Ode to Joy during contractions. I have no idea where that song came from; it was just the one that popped into my head.
Around 4:30, I told Craig that we should go a head and set up the pool, but not fill it yet. I talked to my mom and told her things were starting to go, but still not that fast. The contractions were getting closer, but still hadn’t made it to the place where I felt it necessary to call over the midwives. They did hurt even though they were not terribly long. I just kept up with the kneeling and Craig kept up with the pushing on my back. He commented that my hips were spreading, and he’d been in that position with his hands on my hips enough to notice the difference J.
While he was setting up the pool, I got back into the shower. I was feeling kind of anxious at that point, but still not enough to start telling people to come on over. I thought things were cooking, but that there were hours a head of me. I told Craig they were getting faster, and we should probably update the midwives. While he was on the phone with Terri, she asked if I felt like I needed her to come, and I said, that she could wait till I was ready to push if she wanted. I really didn’t know how long they were supposed to hang out, and I was thinking I still had a long time. She asked him if I was still congenial during contractions, and really I wasn’t terrible nasty, but quiet. I could still talk during a contraction if I really needed to say something, but I didn’t want to talk through them. He told her that I had just begun to not be too congenial during contractions, so she decided to come over just to check on me.
During the five minutes he was on the phone with her, I began to get the feeling that I wanted to climb the walls for every contraction. I still felt like I could handle it though. I was getting a bit teary during the peak moments of contractions, but I got out of the shower and just kept moving around and dropping to my knees for the contractions so Craig could put counter pressure on my back. After Alyra was born, Jenny asked me if I had noticed transition, and I said no. After thinking about it, though, the shower was probably transition, but it was nothing like the fear I had of it. Nothing at all!!
(It’s already difficult to remember some of the details and order of events, but cell phone time stamps help J) At 6:30, shortly after Craig talked to Terri (at 6:12), I told my sister, Jessica, to come over to take pictures, but that she should wait a while. I wanted to be alone till it was really on. I was working, but I was also enjoying an afternoon alone with Craig. It was really our thing. It’s kind of blurry between the TM to my sister and when Terri arrived.
When she came into my room, I informed her that cussing and whining were not helping. I also told her something about the neighbors and them being worried about hearing me scream, but that I was a crier not a screamer. I don’t remember screaming during either one of my previous births.
Terri was getting things together to listen to the baby, and offered to check me if I wanted to see where my dilation was. I wanted her to check and tell me I was at least cooking and could expect baby girl that evening sometime. She asked me where I felt like I was, and I really didn’t have a clue. I did NOT think I was there yet. My contractions still were under a minute long, but they were getting really close. She listened to baby who sounded good. While she was charting my feeling went roller coaster intense. As best I can remember she was writing and I got a contraction that made my head spin, and felt an intense need to poop, I squatted down to get Craig to push on my back and I actually pushed a little and my water broke. I couldn’t sit still long enough for her to do heartbeats again. She managed to get in there somehow and take a heartbeat and check me. I was ready to go!
I started pushing and screaming and yelling. I guess I only thought I was not a screamer. I felt this intense need to drum up every ounce of primal energy I could muster. In the process of bringing that energy out of my core, screaming just felt necessary. I couldn’t not scream. I pushed her, and hard. Terri said something about her getting squeezed and needing to be out. It motivated me to work really hard to get her out. I learned later that she had one (just one) lower than ideal heart rate. Her heart rate went right back where it was supposed to be by the next check.
Craig “I should have told Whittney that Alyra’s heart rate came back up. I have this sense of rhythm and I could hear the deceleration, and I could also hear that it was back and even faster by the next listen.
I pushed on all fours for a bit, and then I asked Terri if there was anything she could do to make it a little easier. She told me to get up on the bed (I think it was her) that I had been leaning on. I pulled my legs back a little, one more than the other and pushed as hard as I could. After a push or two I reached down and felt her head. I thought, “She’s right there, if I can just push hard enough, maybe I can get this over with.” At that point I still had NO expectation of getting her out in 15 minutes. I was expecting to do this work for hours.
I heard Terri call Jenny and tell her to keep coming cause I was really cooking or something of the like. I was sure she’d make it. I just kept screaming and pushing. At some point Terri told me to put my energy out my bottom instead of my throat. She then talked me through grunting her out. The ring of fire came, Terrie told me to keep pushing and my skin would go numb. I don’t think I made it to numb, but I am sure it helped me keep going. I felt a little insane and totally primal! What now seems like only a moment later her head was out. Her cord was around her neck, but loosely. Terri unwrapped it, then Terri asked for one more push and the rest of her came out smoothly. It was 7:22 pm. Terri had only arrived a little more than a half hour earlier.
Craig adds: I just couldn’t believe how fast it was all happening. After watching Elias’s birth and 3 hours of pushing, I was just amazed to watch the swiftness of this birth. In fact when her head came out, I thought something was wrong. I saw a fluid rush, and didn’t know what was going on till I saw her ears. Then I knew it was her head coming and out and I was awestricken. How could it be so fast?
I pulled her up on my chest. She looked a little blue to me so I started rubbing her and shaking her lightly and telling her to make some noise, but she was going within a moment, making those precious first sounds. I had done it. My little angel was in my arms, and her birth had been powerful, swift, and uninterrupted by technology. It wasn’t very long after that that she started nursing and nursed through most of her first night. She nursed for almost 6 hours straight and then slept for about the same amount of time.
Jenny arrived just moments after Alyra was born. Later she was telling me about her dilemma between speeding and arriving before the birth. :)
I felt so taken care of after she was born. Terrie and Jenny watched me, helped get me some food, cleaned everything up, and made sure I could move around. It was like have my really super smart friends help me deliver my baby. Craig kissed me and told me I was amazing. He had his own birth high. He was excited and ready to tell everyone he meets about the precious awesomeness of homebirth.
The thing that made my birth story so very special is that it truly belonged to us: Craig, Alyra, and me. Terri and Jenny were the angels that watched to make sure it went well, and provide expertise, but it was our experience. I really came to understand the difference between being the director of my own birth, and just a participant in someone else’s play.
Frankly, it seems like I haven’t given this story the written might that it deserves. I just can’t express how much this moment has added to who I am. The day of Alyra’s birth will be a beautiful memory that I will reflect on for the rest of my life. The pain, the joy, the love and the power that flowed through my body and through the space around me was intense. It was a day that really added to the bond between Craig and I. It was a day that made me more, more self confident, more secure, and more spiritual. There is no doubt that this precious child I now hold in my arms is a miracle.
Addendum: Terri even came over in the middle of the night on the Friday following her birth because there was something hanging out of my body. It turned out to be a little bit of retained membrane- but it was freaking me out. Terrie said it was definitely something that needed to be removed, but I was a little afraid it was something prolapsed. The care doesn’t stop with the birth J
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